Cape Not Included Unisex T-Shirt
Cape Not Included Unisex T-Shirt
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Made to order. Most U.S. orders arrive in 4-10 business days. Soft unisex fit. Size up for an oversized look.
Shipping & returns
Each tee is made after you order. Most U.S. orders arrive in 4-10 business days; the estimate at checkout is based on the product and destination. If something arrives damaged, defective, or incorrect, contact us within 30 days of delivery.
Fit & fabric
Soft unisex fit with everyday weight. Choose your usual size for a regular fit, or size up if you want a looser oversized look.
Care
Machine wash cold, inside out. Tumble dry low or hang dry. Avoid bleach and ironing directly over the print.
Size Chart
| Size | Chest Width (in) | Body Length (in) |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 16.5 | 27 |
| S | 18 | 28 |
| M | 20 | 29 |
| L | 22 | 30 |
| XL | 24 | 31 |
| XXL | 26 | 32 |
| 3XL | 28 | 33 |
| 4XL | 30 | 34 |
| 5XL | 32 | 35 |
How to Measure
Chest Width: Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit.
Body Length: Measure from the shoulder seam to the bottom hem.
A darkly funny vintage-style tee for the multitaskers, caregivers, working moms, and invisible-load champions doing everything with no cape and very little help. The retro illustration features a woman in a superhero cape juggling groceries, a toddler, a work laptop, and a coffee cup with the calm expression of someone who has absolutely reached capacity.
The text reads “CAPE NOT INCLUDED. NEITHER IS THE HELP.” — a sharp, relatable line for anyone carrying the household, the job, the emotional labor, and the emergency snacks. Designed with a warm cream and deep rose palette, this shirt has a subverted 1950s housewife aesthetic that feels nostalgic, clever, and painfully accurate.
Perfect as a gift for moms, teachers, nurses, caregivers, working parents, burned-out friends, or anyone who deserves more support and fewer errands.